Funny System-Generated Content
From LSWiki
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Lost Souls features a number of mechanisms that auto-create or auto-name content. This page is a collection of funny things that it's generated.
Contents |
Modem the pickpocket
This is a male human with tan skin, gray hair, and blue eyes. He is unkempt and grimy, and has a shifty look. Modem does not look like one of Losthaven's higher-class citizens. He has a few thin wisps of surging radiance and a tracery of sparkling light within and around him. He is resting. He looks about seventeen and a half dimins tall, five and nine twentieths dimins wide, and one and seven twentieths dimins front to back. He is somewhat hurt. He wields an iron dagger in his right hand.
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Modem the pickpocket | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 5 | race: human | sex: male | | align: 0/0 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 438 / 713 | hit points: 694.4 / 694.4 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 262.0 / 262.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 428.0 / 428.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 1.2 / 173.7 (1.2) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 59 0 2 1.00 61 0 61 | | intelligence 58 0 2 1.00 60 0 60 | | constitution 66 0 4 0.99 70 0 70 | | dexterity 58 0 3 0.99 61 0 61 | | willpower 71 0 3 0.99 74 0 74 | | charisma 60 0 3 0.99 63 0 63 | | perception 67 0 3 0.99 70 0 70 | | size 64 0 0 64 0 64 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Fraklord the sailor
This is a male orc with black skin, black hair, and black eyes. His weatherbeaten face is crowned by a pair of busy eyebrows, with suspicious eyes peering out from under them. He looks about seventeen dimins tall, five and three quarters dimins wide, and one and nine twentieths dimins front to back. He is in good shape.
Moron the guard
This is the west end of Gold Street, a dirty alley in a poorer section of Losthaven. It intersects with Copper Street to the west. The area is reasonably well-lit. You see a couple of fresh human corpses, Moron the guard, Bad Idea, and a nymph. Above you is a steadily moving, cloudy night sky. The air is cold. There is a brisk wind. The moon is not visible. Obvious exits are east and west.
Porno Spinner the bank guard
Delete this if not random I guess, but damnit I just noticed it...
This is the Bank of Losthaven. Pillars of white-veined blue stone support the vaulted ceiling, which is decorated in a gold filigree that depicts currencies from around the realm. A plush blue wool carpet bearing the insignia of the City of Losthaven covers most of the floor, giving the room a sense of warmth and comfort, as well as a bit of luxuriance. A low dark brown wooden counter with dark grey iron bars stands in the middle of the room. A bronze brazier hangs from the center of the ceiling, burning with a robust flame and supplying the room with plenty of light. There is a closed steel vault door to the north. The area is reasonably well-lit. You see Snoog the bank guard, Vuln Kaugu-gog the bank guard, Porno Spinner the bank guard, and Gredius. A small dark gray stone sign hangs on the wall. Outside, above you is a racing, lightly clouded sky. Obvious exits are north and west.
Satan Priest the guard
This is the developer 'stat' command screen for the trusty guard the folk of Losthaven rely upon to protect them. Could it be... Satan? Almost enough hit points
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Satan Priest the guard | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 12 | race: kielleth | sex: male | | align: 285/258 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 11285 / 16927 | hit points: 665.0 / 665.0 | | wealth: 151 / 25000 | spell points: 374.0 / 374.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 918.0 / 918.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 11.1 / 132.7 (11.1) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 55 0 6 0.99 61 0 61 | | intelligence 72 0 8 0.98 80 0 80 | | constitution 67 0 6 0.99 73 0 73 | | dexterity 102 0 8 0.97 110 0 110 | | willpower 79 0 9 0.98 88 0 88 | | charisma 79 0 10 0.98 89 0 89 | | perception 92 0 8 0.98 100 0 100 | | size 57 0 0 57 0 57 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Godjizz the guard
Though no known stat display is available for him, there was once a goblin Losthaven guardsman named Godjizz. For years he reigned supreme as the most amazing procedurally-named individual in Lost Souls history, with a serious challenge arriving only with Satan Priest.
Anus the slave
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Anus the slave | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 23 | race: human | sex: male | | align: 0/0 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 320000 / 360000 | hit points: 751.1 / 751.1 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 322.0 / 322.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 1236.0 / 1236.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 1.3 / 109.1 (1.5) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 62 0 15 0.97 77 0 77 | | intelligence 59 0 14 0.97 73 0 73 | | constitution 65 0 16 0.97 81 0 81 | | dexterity 55 0 13 0.97 68 0 68 | | willpower 63 0 18 0.96 81 0 81 | | charisma 67 0 17 0.97 84 0 84 | | perception 66 0 17 0.97 83 0 83 | | size 59 0 0 59 0 59 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
This is a male human with yellowish skin, black hair, and hazel eyes. He is a dominated slave, conditioned by the skillful application of pain and pleasure to obey the priestesses of Tolmet without question. He has a tracery of sparkling light within and around him. He looks about sixteen and a half dimins tall, five and three twentieths dimins wide, and one and three tenths dimins front to back. He is in good shape. He wears a red leather harness across his chest.