Funny System-Generated Content
From LSWiki
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Lost Souls features a number of mechanisms that auto-create or auto-name content. This page is a collection of funny things that it's generated.
Yeoman Cyber Priest
This is a male human with tan skin, brown hair, and blue eyes. He looks healthy and able, and is dressed in the livery of the Camelot yeomanry. He maintains a steady, respectful distance from Sir Proffet. His body has a natural grace and power to it that makes him appears tranquil and free. He has a few thin wisps of surging radiance and a tracery of sparkling light within and around him. His left hand is marked by a scar. He is resting. He looks about seventeen dimins tall, five and a quarter dimins wide, and one and three tenths dimins front to back. He is in good shape and is missing his right hand. He wears a violet-adamantite-segmented strata halfsuit on his body.
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Yeoman Cyber Priest | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 11 | race: human | sex: male | | align: -24/74 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: -250 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 8725 / 11285 | hit points: 607.5 / 632.8 | | wealth: 22766 / 25000 | spell points: 337.0 / 337.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 732.0 / 732.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 4.9 / 130.7 (32.5) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 63 0 5 0.99 68 0 68 | | intelligence 54 0 5 0.99 59 0 59 | | constitution 61 0 7 0.99 68 1 69 | | dexterity 56 0 11 0.98 67 1 68 | | willpower 66 0 10 0.98 76 2 78 | | charisma 58 0 7 0.99 65 3 68 | | perception 64 0 5 0.99 69 0 69 | | size 61 0 0 61 0 61 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Modem the pickpocket
This is a male human with tan skin, gray hair, and blue eyes. He is unkempt and grimy, and has a shifty look. Modem does not look like one of Losthaven's higher-class citizens. He has a few thin wisps of surging radiance and a tracery of sparkling light within and around him. He is resting. He looks about seventeen and a half dimins tall, five and nine twentieths dimins wide, and one and seven twentieths dimins front to back. He is somewhat hurt. He wields an iron dagger in his right hand.
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Modem the pickpocket | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 5 | race: human | sex: male | | align: 0/0 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 438 / 713 | hit points: 694.4 / 694.4 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 262.0 / 262.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 428.0 / 428.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 1.2 / 173.7 (1.2) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 59 0 2 1.00 61 0 61 | | intelligence 58 0 2 1.00 60 0 60 | | constitution 66 0 4 0.99 70 0 70 | | dexterity 58 0 3 0.99 61 0 61 | | willpower 71 0 3 0.99 74 0 74 | | charisma 60 0 3 0.99 63 0 63 | | perception 67 0 3 0.99 70 0 70 | | size 64 0 0 64 0 64 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Fraklord the sailor
This is a male orc with black skin, black hair, and black eyes. His weatherbeaten face is crowned by a pair of busy eyebrows, with suspicious eyes peering out from under them. He looks about seventeen dimins tall, five and three quarters dimins wide, and one and nine twentieths dimins front to back. He is in good shape.
Moron the guard
This is the west end of Gold Street, a dirty alley in a poorer section of Losthaven. It intersects with Copper Street to the west. The area is reasonably well-lit. You see a couple of fresh human corpses, Moron the guard, Bad Idea, and a nymph. Above you is a steadily moving, cloudy night sky. The air is cold. There is a brisk wind. The moon is not visible. Obvious exits are east and west.
Porno Spinner the bank guard
Delete this if not random I guess, but damnit I just noticed it...
This is the Bank of Losthaven. Pillars of white-veined blue stone support the vaulted ceiling, which is decorated in a gold filigree that depicts currencies from around the realm. A plush blue wool carpet bearing the insignia of the City of Losthaven covers most of the floor, giving the room a sense of warmth and comfort, as well as a bit of luxuriance. A low dark brown wooden counter with dark grey iron bars stands in the middle of the room. A bronze brazier hangs from the center of the ceiling, burning with a robust flame and supplying the room with plenty of light. There is a closed steel vault door to the north. The area is reasonably well-lit. You see Snoog the bank guard, Vuln Kaugu-gog the bank guard, Porno Spinner the bank guard, and Gredius. A small dark gray stone sign hangs on the wall. Outside, above you is a racing, lightly clouded sky. Obvious exits are north and west.
Satan Priest the guard
This is the developer 'stat' command screen for the trusty guard the folk of Losthaven rely upon to protect them. Could it be... Satan? Almost enough hit points
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Satan Priest the guard | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 12 | race: kielleth | sex: male | | align: 285/258 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 11285 / 16927 | hit points: 665.0 / 665.0 | | wealth: 151 / 25000 | spell points: 374.0 / 374.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 918.0 / 918.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 11.1 / 132.7 (11.1) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 55 0 6 0.99 61 0 61 | | intelligence 72 0 8 0.98 80 0 80 | | constitution 67 0 6 0.99 73 0 73 | | dexterity 102 0 8 0.97 110 0 110 | | willpower 79 0 9 0.98 88 0 88 | | charisma 79 0 10 0.98 89 0 89 | | perception 92 0 8 0.98 100 0 100 | | size 57 0 0 57 0 57 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Godjizz the guard
Though no known stat display is available for him, there was once a goblin Losthaven guardsman named Godjizz. For years he reigned supreme as the most amazing procedurally-named individual in Lost Souls history, with a serious challenge arriving only with Satan Priest.
Anus the slave
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Anus the slave | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 23 | race: human | sex: male | | align: 0/0 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 320000 / 360000 | hit points: 751.1 / 751.1 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 322.0 / 322.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 1236.0 / 1236.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 1.3 / 109.1 (1.5) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 62 0 15 0.97 77 0 77 | | intelligence 59 0 14 0.97 73 0 73 | | constitution 65 0 16 0.97 81 0 81 | | dexterity 55 0 13 0.97 68 0 68 | | willpower 63 0 18 0.96 81 0 81 | | charisma 67 0 17 0.97 84 0 84 | | perception 66 0 17 0.97 83 0 83 | | size 59 0 0 59 0 59 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
This is a male human with yellowish skin, black hair, and hazel eyes. He is a dominated slave, conditioned by the skillful application of pain and pleasure to obey the priestesses of Tolmet without question. He has a tracery of sparkling light within and around him. He looks about sixteen and a half dimins tall, five and three twentieths dimins wide, and one and three tenths dimins front to back. He is in good shape. He wears a red leather harness across his chest.
Cursedis The Hospitaler
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Cursedis the Hospitaller | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 10 | race: human | sex: male | | align: 851/701 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 5015 / 7523 | hit points: 569.1 / 569.1 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 500.0 / 500.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 446.0 / 446.0 | | attribs: 16 | burden: 9.4 / 106.2 (11.7) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 65 0 6 0.99 71 0 71 | | intelligence 102 0 1 0.99 103 0 103 | | constitution 60 0 6 0.99 66 0 66 | | dexterity 58 0 6 0.99 64 0 64 | | willpower 90 0 1 1.00 91 0 91 | | charisma 97 0 1 0.99 98 0 98 | | perception 65 0 8 0.98 73 0 73 | | size 60 0 0 60 0 60 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
This is a male human with golden skin, golden hair, and golden eyes. He looks about sixteen and a half dimins tall, five and a fifth dimins wide, and one and three tenths dimins front to back. He is in good shape. He wields a steel rod in his right hand. He wears a red-striped-white-cotton-trimmed cotton robe around his body, a pair of leather sandals on his feet, a white wool cap on his head, a cotton sash around his waist, a silver rosary around his neck, and a pair of cotton gloves on his hands.
is limbs are named head, chest, right arm, left arm, right hand, left hand, right leg, left leg, right foot, and left foot. Cursedis (~Losthaven/mon/hospitaller#448804) was created by Almior, Bectile, Crylos, Gara, Chaos, and Bannor; the source code was last updated Fri May 16 15:07:23 2014. The human race (/def/race/h/human) was created by Lost Souls; the source code was last updated Fri Oct 18 15:48:27 2013.
Nigga the fighter
Nigga the fighter is here. This is a female ogre with brown skin, black hair, and brown eyes. She is incredibly muscular, and her stature suggests that she has considerable combat experience. She has a misshapen scar on her neck in the shape of thick mug being slashed by a huge sword. Her discolored fangs press firmly against her upper lip. The brand on her neck represents her status as a fierce fighter of Og Village. She has a tracery of sparkling light and a webwork of surging radiance within and around her. Her left arm, left leg, and left foot are each crisscrossed with scars. Her chest is marked by several scars. Her right arm is disfigured by horrible scarring. She looks about twenty-seven and a half dimins tall, ten dimins wide, and two and eleven twentieths dimins front to back. She is in good shape. She wields a giant iron sword in her hands. She wears an enormous dark gray coyote fur hide gauntlet on her left hand and an enormous red fox fur hide gauntlet on her right hand.
Hobo the orc acolyte
+------------------------------- Basic Stats ---------------------------------+ | Hobo | +----------------------+---------------------------+--------------------------+ | level: 4 | race: orc | sex: male | | align: 600/500 | lives: 0 | kills: 0 | | hunger: 0 | thirst: 0 | diet: omnivore | +----------------------------------+---------------+--------------------------+ | experience: 269 / 438 | hit points: 689.5 / 689.5 | | wealth: 0 / 25000 | spell points: 126.0 / 126.0 | | limbs: 10 | endurance: 514.0 / 514.0 | | attribs: 0 | burden: 9.9 / 143.4 (9.9) | +------------------------+---------+---------------+--------------------------+ | attribute original permadj develop next natural modify total | | strength 93 0 4 0.99 97 0 97 | | intelligence 51 0 2 1.00 53 0 53 | | constitution 109 0 3 0.99 112 0 112 | | dexterity 46 0 1 1.00 47 0 47 | | willpower 32 0 1 1.00 33 0 33 | | charisma 51 0 1 1.00 52 0 52 | | perception 68 0 3 0.99 71 0 71 | | size 64 0 0 64 0 64 | +------------------------+-------------------------+--------------------------+
Kolond the Albino Thondur Thug
Kolond is here.
This is a female thond with white skin, white hair, and pink eyes. This tough-looking individual seems to live strictly to cause trouble. There's a malicious glint in her eyes, and her icy sneer could never be mistaken for anything remotely resembling friendly. She bears a blue tattoo of crossed swords on her right cheek as a symbol of her devotion to the robber baroness Nyseem. She has a webwork of sparkling light within and around her. She looks about twelve and a half dimins tall, seven and a quarter dimins wide, and one and four fifths dimins front to back. She is in good shape. She has a brass knuckle-duster mounted on her left hand and a brass knuckle-duster mounted on her right hand.
Best wand ever
This is a red iron wand decorated with runes and sigils all along its length. It is in perfect condition. It looks about a tenth of a dimin across and two and eleven twentieths dimins long. It weighs very little. You appraise it at twenty gold.
You feel knowledge of wands of void-lightning drift into your mind like a long-forgotten memory. After a moment, you also find yourself somehow knowing that the red iron wand of void-lightning can be activated by singing or shouting the word "beyotch" in Zadjalin.