Leolla's Guide to being an ELF
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Revision as of 22:00, 25 February 2008
Contents |
Introduction
Hi everyone!
Leolla here =D!
This here guide will tell you how to be a successful Erisian Liberation Front member/theologian/guerilla/benchwarmer/pot pie maker!
If you want to be an elf then:
1) That's lower case! Maybe you're in the wrong place? o_O
b) Make one! If you can't figure that out, then you're gonna have problems!
III) Unless you want to be an elf ELF. Maybe you could be Elfy McElven the Elven Elf! Maybe the developers will zap you eighty ways from tomorrow!
Note: Eris is not responsible for any insanity, death, no pie, or sudden total protonic reversal caused by invocation of any of the Elder Gods or generally playing with cosmic forces what are beyond the ken of mortals. Or following any of Leolla's advice. And since Leolla is less than Eris, then by the transitive property of Chaos, Leolla is even less responsible.
And she's pretty irresponsible.
About The Best Guild Evuh
First, don't tell the other guilds we're in the best guild ever. They get Paranoid, and Jealous, and Thirsty.
Then they get all emo like this: (//_o)
Secondly, assess your personality. Ask yourself some questions:
- Do I like utter, incomprehensible randomness?
- Do I like utter, incomprehensible dying?
- Do I like pie and insanity?
- Does the idea of strange, unfair things happening to me make me smile?
If you said "no" to any of these, there's something wrong with you. It is a personality test after all.
For the low low price of 110% of everything you ever make, we at Leolla Worshipfulness Institute can part you with 110% of everything you make trying to fix what's wrong with you. You'll be clear of Kazar before you know it!
You'll be a Pope before you know it!
You'll be dead before you know it!
If you said yes to all of them, then you may just have what it takes!
Being a fully trained ELF means you will have a wide assortment of abilities at your fingertips, some of which can even be used to injure someone other than yourself!
Joining The Best Guild Evuh
Sinister Dexter hangs out of his own free will on the ninth floor of the Shadow Tower. If you visit him, he'll tell you that you have to see a god in action before you're qualified to go trying to bum the proverbial ride from them.
A popular choice is Apollo, who just tends to hang around his temple waiting to be prayed to, but is a bit deaf. You may have to pray to him several times.
Other more dangerous choices include saying "Hai" to Cthulhu, Yog-Sothoth and Abhoth. They hangout on R'yleh waiting to ea...for you to drop in for a bi..visit.
Begging for help to get to see Ess Dee is probably your best way to start. He's behind a locked door, and that'll save you alot of annoyance trying to find a lockpick and raise the appropriate skill or get a key or whatever. Do NOT try to break down the door, unless you wanna play "Catch the Singularity Staff" with Kalyxes. And that's not a euphemism.
Leolla's Suggestions on Stats and Skills
Stats and skills, stats and skills. Where do I put what? Should I give myself ton of strength or what?
Well, as always, there are a few rules. Which you should, as always, feel free to totally ignore. Or canonize.
- Have fun. If you want to be a maximum sized zuth with no charisma ELF, do it.
- Consider spreading out your skills instead of trying to be the bestest at one thing: that 20th spec in chaos affinity may not be as cool as your 2nd in elder lore.
